In this week’s blog, I listened to Lulu Wang’s podcast What You Don't Know and have interpreted and annotated her story in order to write about a moment that had a negative impact on my life from a choice my parents made, in particular from my dad. I haven’t personally made any decisions that have a negative impact, so below is a moment I know that fits well for this week’s post.
I looked down at the purple and gold pamphlet, the students on the cover smiled at me. I became excited because I already knew I wanted to apply to this school early in my senior year of high school, to West Chester University. All three of my brothers attended, along with my older sister and my mom. The campus was basically engraved in me, how could I not go there? I walked up the stairs to show my mom the possibility to my future. As I opened the door, my mom already knew what I wanted to discuss. She sat on her bed with blue papers laid out in front of her. She told me to get my twin sister Ana so we could discuss our college plans. It seemed difficult for her to express, but she eventually explained that she was unable to send the both of us to a four-year university. My sister and I were crushed; she wanted to attend West Chester for Early Education and I for Studio Arts. Of course, we didn’t plan on liking the same school, but we assumed it would be affordable for our mom. In my mom’s hand, she held a paper with a graph of the cost of community college compared to a four-year college. There was a drastic difference, but I didn’t want to say anything. My mom described that in order for her to afford to send us to college, we would have to attend community college. Ana and I sat there in silence. We didn’t fight back as we usually did because we didn’t want to hurt her feelings. We nodded and agreed to this decision. Although my mom made the conclusion to send my sister and I to community college, it was made due to the financial impact my dad had caused for my family. The financial decisions my father had caused for me and my family had made a huge negative impact on my life. He destroyed my mom's credit. I still love him, but this decision had affected my future. My family and I lived in a beautiful home, with a pool and backyard. Friends and family regularly visited and we hosted many gatherings and parties. In 2012, we discovered that we had to move and my mom was forced to become self-supportive. We eventually found a small house, and I began to feel as though life was moving too fast. My dad’s choices caused me to become depressed. I saw a psychologist which made me feel a little better, but it didn’t bring back my old life. Eventually I recovered, but I am still faced with the remnants of the choices my dad had produced. My dream of attending my first college choice was ruined. Even though I am receiving a great education from community college at a lower price, I am at a loss of experiences and independence I desperately crave.
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After reading and annotating the text Hills Like White Elephants by Ernest Hemingway, I have written a moment in my current life, including dialogue and symbolic details. Below, is a scene of how my Monday morning went, and how I was able to fix my class schedule for this fall semester.
Sitting in my Uber, I twiddle my fingers as I stare at the time— 9:00 a.m. I’m supposed to be there at 9. I feel anxiety building up in me as I tell myself, “I’m going to be late for my appointment with Professor Gutman”. As I am thinking this to myself, my Uber driver asks, “do you have a 9:30 class?” I shake my head no and explain, “no, I’m having a professor review my AP studio art portfolio”. We pull up to the Academic Building at the Delaware County Community College Marple campus where I am getting dropped off. I grab by big black art portfolio case and the car door handle to leave when my driver exclaims, “good luck on your portfolio review!” “Thank you, have a nice day!” I reply back. I race to the Academic Building, staring at my phone to look for the room number. I finally find it and see a woman typing away at her computer. “You must be Christina, my 9 o'clock appointment”. I shake my head to confirm and she continues to tell me, “hold on one second, I have to finish this email”. I patiently sit next to her in a cluttered office. “I have been waiting to meet with you, I must review your portfolio in order to reward you the correct classes based on your AP score. You can set out all of your pieces on this table over here”. She points to an unused office table, “you received a five out of five for your score correct?” I respond, “ yes”, as I’m finishing laying out my images. “What high school did you go to?” She’s asks. “Strath Haven” I answer. “Oh you must have been in the art exhibit earlier this year”. “Yea and I actually had this image in that show”, I point to the watercolor painting of a burger and sweet potato fries. Professor Gutman replies, “I think I remember seeing that and it making me hungry” she chuckles. She continues to look at each piece and asks, “so are all of these pen drawings?” “Some are in pen, but I also have images done in watercolor and acrylic.” She nods and moves closer to my black and white pen drawing. “I see you have some black and white observational drawings. What was your score again? Oh yeah five that is excellent. Since you aren’t taking any art classes, I will award you credit for ART 130 Drawing I so you can start taking Two Dimensional Design”. A smile grows on my face in the bright colorful office and I reply, “ thank you!” We walk over to her computer and Professor Gutman tells me, “let me write a few emails so we can get you started in this art course”. I silently nod and wait as she taps away on her keyboard. “Is it okay if I put you in the Wednesday’s Two Dimensional class? It is from 5-10 pm.” “Yes that will fit into my schedule”, I add. She responds, “okay this is great. You will have to work your ass off because I am placing you in so late in this class, but I can clearly see from your portfolio that you will do fine. See me in two weeks to tell me how you’re doing!” “Thank you so much, I really appreciate it! Does that mean I still have to go to my Western Civilization II class?” I question. “No you’re good, you no longer need to take that class, you can go do whatever until your next class!” she suggest, waving her hands at me. I say with a feeling of relief, “okay thanks again!” I am so glad that my schedule is fixed and am now able to take art classes this semester! For this week's blog post, I have read What is Creative Nonfiction? By Lee Gutkind, Making Scenes in Memoir by Lee Martin, and My Name is Margaret by Maya Angelou in order to understand and write a scene that shows a moment in my life. Below is a scene describing time well spent with my two dogs!
Sitting on a heather grey couch in my living room, I look down at my phone, swiping through my emails for the day. Moments pass by when suddenly I hear a little low-pitched growl and a wagging white tail in the corner of my eye. I look up and see my jack russell; Clark, pleading for me to give him attention with his big brown eyes. In a high-pitched voice I exclaim, “hi Clark!”. Immediately, he rolls over on his back, expecting me to pet him. I scratch his side up and down, watching his white hair fall to the side of the couch cushion. I hear the footsteps of my brother coming up from the basement and he calls, “Clark”. Clarks ears raise to the sound of his voice, and he excitedly jumps off of the grey couch, leaving the living room. To the right of me, I see my dog Ella laying at the end of the couch. I call for here, “puppy!” She doesn’t flinch, so I snap my fingers a few times, hoping she will react. Eventually, she turns her head and looks at me upside down, exposing her small crooked teeth. I begin to stroke her soft feather-like black and white hair, closing her eyes after each stroke. Wiggling her nose, she lifts up her head to sniff me, and then rolls back to her original position. In the distance, I can hear both my brother and mom vocalizing, almost giving me a headache because of its consistency. Over the vocalizing, the rain outside of the window behind me taps to a beat. I can feel the humidity of the air. Again, I look over and see an overly excited havanese staring at me, wagging her long white tail. As I move closer to her, she falls back to her side, and paws her arms at me. I tease her by pretending to pick her up by grabbing her sides. Instantly, she wiggles her head to the left of her body, attempting to bite my hand. Ella widens her mouth and I can smell her hot breath as she pants in my face. Breaking away from my grasp, she turns around and begins to quickly dig into the couch. Before I can say anything, she leaps off of the couch and sprints into my bedroom. I follow her, and find her laying on her stomach with her legs sprawled out like a frog. “What are you doing fluffy?” I question. In a silent response, Ella moves her head, biting the air and exposes her pink tongue. She inches towards me by crawling, jingling her name tag. Unfortunately, I begin to feel the vibration of my phone, alarming me at 5:30 p.m. that it is time to leave for work. I rub Ella’s small head, and begin to stand up. “Ella, I have to leave”, I tell her. I give her one last pat on her white back, and leave for work. The assignment for this blog post is to read Teach Writing as a Process Not a Product by Don Murray, The Daily Writing Routines of Great Writers by Maria Popova, and Bird by Bird: Some Instructions on Writing and Life by Anne Lamott and choose three quotes from each article that appeal to me as well as incorporate three personal quotes in order to create a scene for a writers’ roundtable discussion about the writing process.
After a long day of painting in my art studio, I decided to take a break from hours of sitting by going on a walk. It was a nice spring day, with a swift breeze brushing my hair to the side. A bright bush of pink and yellow flowers along my path put me in a positive mood, bringing a smile to my face. As I walked through a park, I decided to sit on a blue metal bench to admire the scenery, maybe gain some inspiration for my next painting. Across from me I could hear a group of people chatting and enjoying a picnic. The subject of their conversation seemed to be about the writing process. A man caught my attention when I heard him state, “It is not the job of the teacher to legislate the students truth. It is the responsibility of the student to explore his own world with his own language, to discover his own meaning”. Everyone in the group nodded in agreement, and I even found myself nodding with them. He saw my small gesture and waved for me to join him and his friends. He introduced himself as Don Murray and the rest of the group did the same. Don unwrapped a chicken sandwich and handed it to me with a smile and continued, “No matter how careful our criticisms, they do not help the student since when we teach composition we are not teaching a product, we are teaching a process”. This group was definitely intelligent, they’re obviously professional writers. A woman who had introduced herself as Anne Lamott took a bite of her apple, and in between chews commented, “Writing can be a pretty desperate endeavor, because it is about some of our deepest needs: our need to be visible, to be heard, our need to make sense of our lives, to wake up and grow and belong”. I wanted some insight and learn something for myself. Usually whenever I have to write, I struggle beginning my writing process. I finally asked, “writing can take time and sometimes deadlines can discourage my creativity, how do I start the writing process?” There was a moment of silence, and I waited for a response. Anne swallowed the rest of her apple and looked at me with reassuring eyes and suggested, “Almost all good writing begins with terrible first efforts. You need to start somewhere. Start by getting something-- anything-- down on paper.” I was beginning to feel relieved, and even inspired. It is the process of perfecting and editing that allows me to develop ideas, and experiment what works and doesn’t work for me. She finishes by saying, “Writing is so often making mistakes and feeling lost”. Susan Sontag was sitting comfortable next to Ann and laughed in agreement exclaiming, “I write in spurts. I write when I have to because the pressure builds up and I feel enough confidence that something has matured in my head and I can write it down”. This made me realize that all I needed to do was just write in order to eventually commit to one thought. Don swiped some brie on a water cracker and added, “There must be time for the writing process to take place and time for it to end”. He made a good point, but I was still confused and questioned, “Sometimes I don’t know what to write about, where can I find inspiration?” I was kind of starting to feel embarrassed for asking a dumb question. Ray Bradbury pointing a plastic knife covered in brie at me and said, “my passions drive me to the typewriter everyday of my life, and they have driven me there since I was twelve”. I chuckled a little, just thinking of the fact that he still uses a typewriter. I guess he’s right because it is always easier to write about something that is interesting or remotely appealing Ernest Hemingway passed me a bowl of red grapes and looked me in the eye to make sure I was listening to him. He took a sip of his iced tea and noted, “You write until you come to a place where you still have your juice and know what will happen next and you stop and try to live through until the next day when you hit it again”. I knew exactly what he was talking about. Whenever I am painting, I just drag my paintbrush against the canvas and eventually create a masterpiece. I begin to stand up and say, “but before you finish a masterpiece, you need an unbiased opinion to see if others like or agree with your final outcome”. Writing doesn’t come easy, just like painting. It takes trial and error before getting to your final piece and you can never predict when the creative process will occur. Teach Writing as a Process Not a Product (Don Murray)
For my first blog post, I have read The Proust Questionnaire. If you want to know more about me, below are my answers to hopefully give some insight on my personality and who I am. Although I may have left some questions unanswered, I made sure to answer these questions as honestly as possible, enjoy!
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Chrissie FackenthallI will use this blog to write and post weekly assignments for my English Composition I course at Delaware County Community College Archives
December 2018
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